Mechawhales, I repeat it, Mecha-f*cking-whales is the name of this franchise, created by Hauke Scheer - his designs can be seen on DeviantArt, the backstory of the whales can be read on this site - you can also watch two animated short films about it -, and here I'm going to show you the latest character incarnation, the limited 3.5" Infantry Whale PVC figure, chicky-cheeky-check i' out:
Would pass as the secret love child of Dennis Nedry and that Dilophosaurus
Writing that I wish I could be 5 years old now would be true to some degree, but that fact is, the sight of this magnificent cetacean made me feel like a kid again for hours. Alas, it's been a long time since I could afford to spend 50 bucks on an action figure, but a man-child can dream and it would certainly be sweet to own one of these one day. For now, I wish the very best for Mr. Scheer and his vision, hopefully it becomes a cult hit, and one day we can see a live-action movie adaptation, either with or without the involvement of Michael Bay.
... and if you are wondering, what would happen if a fifty ton sperm whale (alright, I know you could hardly hold it back the first time; let's hear a huge giggity) walked ashore on mechanical legs, look no further than Junji Ito's horror manga, Gyo. It's a tale of bio-mech terror, foul body gas and disgusting sea life, both creepy and (mostly because of the translation) funny at the same time, highly recommended stuff.
Yes, you are supposed to read that from right to left
*Yup, I do know that whales are mammals, and not fish. The title is merely a reference to Christopher Lloyd's book from that half-assed Piranha sequel, which was a reference itself to a scene in Joe Dante's original Piranha, that was referencing the Creature from the Black Lagoon series, which was referenced in the third Back to the Future movie. I'm not sure where I'm going with this, but hey, that too had Christopher Lloyd...
So, it seems that Big Boss had real reasons why to build Metal Gears...
ReplyDeleteAnyway, for Big G, these walking whales are nothing, but dinner. Or dessert. Who knows. :D
You must be thinking of GINO, he's the one with the sushi-fetish. Nah, just kidding.
DeleteBut yeah, in an overly realistic movie where the big guy doesn't feed on pure radiation or kaijus like the turtle in Tokyo S.O.S., his presence affecting whales and other species in the ocean would be an interesting plot point.
Steve Alten came up with something like that in his first MEG novel. When a Megalodon managed to migrate from a deep sea trench to the pelagic zone, it automatically became the apex predator of the oceans, and the whole ecosystem collapsed with whales and sharks running scared all around the globe.
Speaking of which, what if Gojira in the '14 movie will be a bloodthirsty predator?
ReplyDeleteI mean, the guys at the Legendary Pictures said, that this movie will be "grounded and realistic".
Feeding off a nuclear power plant isn't too realistic. :D
He has to eat something alright... whales are still my best bet, but there will be not one, but two more kiajus to fight him. I'm pretty sure he's going to chew on one of them. Remember when he killed Anguirus in 'Raids Again? Yeesh.
DeleteYes, but after he run out of Kaijus, G still needs somethin' to eat. :D
DeleteExcept if Kaiju monsters are gonna multiply in a very uncomfortable way. >:D
Hm... maybe they should make G a mutated marine iguana again, but this time portray that species in a 100% biologically correct way, and have him feed one juicy, slimy algae all day long. THAT would be realistic.
DeleteOr, he will be a mutated Komodo dragon. :D
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