Dino Porn

Sometimes I try to write movie scripts when I'm drunk. Really weird, but somehow cool ideas come this way all the time. I've just made a teaser poster for the latest one, don't be shy, click on it:

Here's a link for the uncensored version - kids stay away, I mean it.

Yes, I'm thinking about making a dinosaur porn. Not a very original idea, but listen: It would be a hardcore sci-fi romance, set on Earth in the year 2293. It's a typical cyberpunk future with all the great skyscrapers, flying cars, underground gangs and walls of computers that look like they were made in the 1960s. But besides all this, mankind has finally cloned dinosaurs - mutant ones, who are really intelligent, capable of thinking, speaking like a human, and feeling real emotions, including love and lust.

Our main characters would be two cops/detectives (investigating sexual crimes of course), a young girl called Miki (it's a Japanese women's name, as a little tribute to the Heisei era of the Godzilla films, that's all the significance it has), who happens to end up as the roommate of her colleague, Gabriel (now I'm not sure why I chose this name - but I think it has a nice chemistry with Miki), an eight foot tall, genetically engineered, violent Deinonychus. Of course, as an inside joke, everyone would call him a Raptor, because of the infamous Jurassic-screw up with the species classification, first by Michael Crichton (RIP), later by the creators of the film, who modelled the raptors with Deinonychus scale. (Stan Winston was a real talent nevertheless, sad R, I and P letters for him too.)

Anyways, these two would end up together as the first human-dinosaur couple. Reptile and primate. Interspecies stuff, yes, but don't forget, I'm not talking about zoophilia. It's something futuristic, entirely fictional. And cool. A bit like the old dragon and virgin princess scenario, set in the future, with a surprising twist.

Oh, yeah, Miki should definitely be an Asian girl. I think they are the cutest specimens of the Homo sapiens, and would make an aesthetic contrast with those huge carnivores. Seriously, this stuff could be the new Twilight. Only that it would be really provocative, funny, interesting, and could easily earn a cult status. The Fifth Element on crack, or something like that.

Now I just have to write the script and find a producer who's crazy enough. Wish me luck, while you are calling me a pathetic zoophile nerd who should get a life. (I won't deny that last statement.) Hollywood, I'm coming.

Roar.